Explore The Four Parenting Styles
(Which one are you?)
I think you'd agree that every parent wants to raise their child to be responsible, respectful, rational, and resilient. But every child is different. What works for one child might backfire on the other. So approaching parenting with a "one size fits all" approach is inefficient. That's why exploring these four parenting styles can give you an advantage.
On this page, you'll:
- Explore all four parenting styles in detail.
- Uncover the strengths and weaknesses of each.
- Get simple suggestions to help you be more effective and balanced in your parenting approach.
Every parent uses a mixture of all four styles. Your unique order of priority shapes how your child experiences you. Take a moment to rank these four styles from the one you use the most to the one you use the least.
The Protector Parent
Your strength is your safety. But too much protection can feel like a prison.
You lead with responsibility. You’re alert, aware, and deeply focused on keeping your child safe. But sometimes, safety turns into control and your child may not feel trusted.
This can lead to rebellion, secrecy, or a child who complies outwardly but hides their true self inside.
(e.g. The straight-A student who secretly parties or hides their true self just to avoid conflict.)
Try this:
Trade control for connection. Ask more questions than you give orders. Let your child make safe mistakes and come to you afterward without fear. Your job isn’t to be a shield forever, it’s to teach them how to build their own.
The Adventurer Parent
Your strength is your freedom. But too much freedom without guidance can leave a child lost.
You lead with flexibility. You want your child to be confident, independent, and not feel boxed in. But sometimes, that free spirit forgets structure and kids actually crave structure more than they admit.
Without clear expectations or consistency, your child may grow up without boundaries, struggle with discipline, or feel unprepared for real-world responsibility.
Consider this:
A child who never had a bedtime or expectations might later struggle with time management, jobs, or school deadlines.
Try this:
Set rhythms, not rules. Turn your energy into rituals. Morning routines, bedtime stories, check-ins. Give freedom within a framework. That’s how you raise both creative and capable children.
The Strategist Parent
Your strength is your logic. But logic without warmth can leave a child feeling unseen.
As a Strategist Parent, you excel in creating structured and organized environments for your child. Your logical approach ensures they have clear expectations and goals. Enhance your parenting by incorporating flexibility, allowing for creative expression and adaptability. Consider involving your child in problem-solving activities, fostering their critical thinking skills while maintaining a balanced structure.
You lead with wisdom. You’re grounded, practical, and likely have clear expectations for your child. But sometimes, you under express affection, thinking that structure is enough.
As a result, your child may grow up feeling emotionally disconnected or seek affection from unsafe sources.
Try this:
Say “I’m proud of you” before they earn the A+. Hug them when nothing’s wrong. Make space for feelings, even if they don’t make sense. Connection builds compliance - not the other way around.
The Nurturer Parent
Your strength is your heart. But sometimes, your heart makes the rules, and your child misses the lesson.
You lead with love. You’re emotionally attuned and deeply care about how your child feels. But sometimes, your fear of causing emotional pain prevents you from following through on consequences.
As a result, your child may not learn accountability, and you might find yourself being taken advantage of; even unintentionally.
Try this:
Love and limits go hand in hand. Boundaries don’t mean you’re being mean, they mean you’re being mature. Follow through with calm, consistent consequences so your child learns to respect both you and themselves.
(Ex: “I love you enough to not let you get away with something that will hurt you in the long run.”)
