It’s not disobedience. It’s wiring.

I want to share something that brings parents to tears because it finally explains what years of frustration never could.

Here it is:

Not listening is rarely disobedience.

It’s usually personality.

Here's an example:

One dad said the following, “I explain things so clearly. Why does my son look away, shut down, or act confused every time I talk to him?”

Can you relate to that dad's frustration?

One of the biggest keys to communicating effectively, is to communicate in a manner that your child can understand. 

Some kids need short, direct instructions.
Some kids need warmth and reassurance.
Some kids need space to process.
Some need a visual example.
Some need a calm tone.
Some need to feel capable, not corrected.
Some need to talk before acting.
Some need to act before talking.

Here’s the truth:

Kids don’t respond to words.

They respond to communication that matches their wiring.

When you learn your child’s personality:

• communication gets easier
• instructions land
• meltdowns decrease
• confidence grows
• connection deepens
• cooperation increases

This is why understanding your child’s personality is the next step after understanding survival mode.

Because survival mode tells you what your child feels,
but personality tells you why they react the way they do.

So remember, none of this means you’re doing anything wrong. It just means your child is wired differently than you.

Tomorrow, I’m going to send you something that will help you understand your child in a way you never have before.

Talk to you soon,
Devin Trent

Action step:

Pay attention today: notice how your child reacts to your tone, not just your words.